Lessons from exchange: enjoy the moment for what it is

Why did you pick Bangkok? 

‘I had Japan and South Korea already picked out, and I was struggling to choose a third option. I was debating between Hong Kong and Bangkok. Then I went to KINO to see a Thai film called How to Make Millions Before Your Grandma Dies. I didn’t understand much of it because my Dutch is a bit limited, but the city where it was set just looked incredibly interesting to me. I’d never seen anything like it. I got home that night and thought, I’ll pick Bangkok. The deadline was two days later. They accepted me, so that was that.’ 

What was arriving like? 

‘I had to stay in Finland for a day because of a delay, so I arrived exhausted and very jet-lagged. I got into a taxi to the first introductory event with the only other Erasmus student who was supposed to be going there with me. He told me he didn’t like the city at all and that he was thinking about catching a plane home that night.  

That was only my first hour in Bangkok, so I had to build some sort of other connections quickly. And in a way, that pushed me into meeting people I might not have met otherwise. I got lucky with my accommodation, which was basically a dorm for exchange students. Every day in the lobby, there was someone to talk to. Most of the friends I ended up spending my time with, I met during that first day.’ 

Besides other exchange students, did you make any local friends? 

‘Easier than I initially expected, honestly. The university assigned me a study buddy who showed me around during my first weeks, took me through Chinatown and its art district, and introduced me to karaoke bars. But some of the most memorable connections happened completely by chance. I met one of my closest Thai friends in a cinema. We got talking after the film, just about what we thought of it, and then we kept meeting up. He was moving on from his family’s business to open his own music store. Watching someone have that kind of drive was genuinely inspiring. Before I left, he even gave me a custom cassette tape from the store.  

It also helps that Thai people are very open and approachable. One of the first times I got caught in a monsoon, I was completely soaked trying to get to the gym and ended up sheltering under the roof of someone’s shop. They were watching a Muay Thai fight with friends, saw the state I was in, and just invited me to join them. They didn’t speak any English. We communicated through body language and vibes, mostly. They told me it would rain for another 30 minutes and to just sit and wait. That kind of moment, where a stranger just opens their door to you without a second thought, is something I will remember for a long time.’ 

How did the city itself surprise you? 

‘The transport was the biggest shock. I knew Bangkok was a big city, but I hadn’t realised how completely car-centred it is. Motorbikes improvise their own lanes, two-lane highways become three-lane highways and then four-lane highways. Everything moves by car, because the public transport network is not that extensive. I used taxis almost everywhere. My friends all used motorbike taxis, but given the traffic situation, I decided against that.  

The other surprise was the pace. Bangkok never really sleeps. In Rotterdam, by ten in the evening, most things have closed. In Bangkok, ten o’clock is when I would normally go out for dinner. That took some adjusting to. The sun also sets at six every day without fail, so if you wanted to see anything outdoors or visit a park, you had to plan around that.  

Did you ever experience actual culture shock? 

‘The hardest thing was the scale of Bangkok. In Rotterdam, there might be one or two big events a month, and you can plan for them. In Bangkok, there was something I wanted to do almost every single day. I had to learn to pace myself. To accept that it was okay if I didn’t make it to a gallery opening or a film screening, because I had been out six days in a row and I needed to rest. You can spend 30 years in Bangkok and still not see everything.  

The one night I would do again without hesitation was a free gallery night organised by the French arts institute. It was their last year, and they spent everything that was left in the budget. Around 50 to 100 galleries were open, transport between them was free, and each gallery had free food and drinks. I spent eight hours with friends moving through it.’ 

What did the exchange teach you?  

‘I think it taught me that happiness genuinely starts with you. Not with a checklist of things you have or don’t have. Seeing people who were happy talking to strangers, happy to sit with a soaked tourist under their roof, happy to spend an evening explaining politics to someone they’d just met, it made me slow down. In Rotterdam, I was always in a rush. Get the assignment done, send the internship email, prepare for the exam. In Bangkok, I learned to enjoy the moment for what it is. And I think the culture helped. If I had done my exchange in Tokyo or Hong Kong, where the culture is very work-focused, I might have sat around thinking I wasn’t doing enough. The Thai way of life just helped me come to terms with taking it easy.’

What would you say to Erasmus School of Economics students considering exchange? 

‘Just go. I have not read a single exchange report from any student at any university who said they regretted it. Even an internship or a minor are things you can do at other points in your life. Living for four months in a foreign country, surrounded by other people doing the same thing, meeting friends of friends who are on their own exchanges in Japan or India, doing gallery nights in Bangkok with a friend who just flew in from Seoul: that is only available to you right now. In a few years, when you want to spend a week in Tokyo, you are not going to have ten people ready to show you around. That window is open now, just take it.’